Sabotaging Spiritual Guidance

How could you not know!
Sabotaging Spiritual Guidance.

Sabotaging is one of the most common hurdles for a person new to trying to receive Spiritual Guidance. For the person who comes to Guidance through severe challenges, their Ego expression of identity is easily added to a supportive team of identity expressions. That is, the Ego either cooperates, or, it dies with the physical body. Most people come to search for Spiritual Guidance by a more relaxed form of choice. For them, it is much more abstract to convince the Ego that Spiritual Guidance is a better route.

Ego and SuperEgo (social conscience) interference can often be pointed out with the following terms:

Betrayal: Isn't (something else) better -- more important?
Delay: I'll do it next; I want to do (something else) first.
Denial: I didn't know; Are you sure you told me.
Excuse: I had other things to do; not enough time.
Fogging: What was that request again? Again? Again?
Forgetting: It must have slipped my mind; I must have forgotten.
Procrastinating: If it needs to be done, someone else will do it.
Rebelling: I don't want to do it; It isn't my style/way/desire.
Sabotaging: I'll do it (but I won't); You can(not) count on me.
Stalling: Can it wait until ...; I don't think I can do it until ....
Subversion: Do you think it necessary? What about (something else)?

NONE of these are valid for putting Spiritual Guidance second.
MOST of them can have validity in other circumstances.
ALL of these can represent PATTERNS of interfering behavior.

The situation is similar to trying to convince a dictator or a young spoiled child that the power they have seemed to always have had is not as positive and constructive in the longer-term as if they cooperate with elected officials or playground peers. For the stronger Ego person, this commitment is even more intense. How do you make the change from autocracy to democracy?
Change, within a spiritual perspective, should not be effected by force or edict. An assertive communication approach is imperative. Aggressiveness simply creates a hidden rebel looking for a chance to pass on on pass back the violence brought to them. Passiveness simply condones the destructive Ego behavior and provides justification to the Ego for it not considering or allowing change. So what is an assertive approach?

Benefits and disadvantages are defined;
Understanding the proposed changes is facilitated;
Potential weaknesses of the participant are acknowledged;
Skills are refined and developed for greater strength;
Performance levels for praise and penalty are defined;
Feedback for consistency is requested, and, hopefully given;
Failures to communicate and act are questioned for resolve;
Dismissal from the team of members who will not integrate.

Benefits for the changing to adopt Spiritual Guidance, as well as the disadvantages of the current Reptilian mind habit have been defined. What is to be gained by receiving Spiritual Guidance that the Ego does not have now? What will the Ego continue to lose by forgoing such Guidance. Like a small child, whose memory and brain is undergoing a development of capabilities, the Ego may have to be reminded frequently at first. There are Balancing Seminar pages, seminar tapes, Balancing website descriptions and team support articles that all address these points.
The individual is encouraged to have their Personal Spirit "talk" to their Ego on a daily basis thereby instilling the memory by enlisting the help of the habit structure we term our Unconscious, or Reptilian brain. Psychologists have long known that people who "talk to themselves" are frequently more intelligent than the average person.

Understanding the proposed changes is facilitated.
In a much more extensive manner than the benefits and disadvantages were set out, an understanding of teamwork and its demands can also be found on the Balancing Seminar pages, seminar tapes, Balancing website descriptions and team support articles. Ultimately, the strength of any unified force is usually more efficient and effective than the efforts of individuals working in confusion with each wanting its own way and deciding its own priorities. The change here is learning to be part of a team rather than continuing to go ahead alone.
Respect for other team participants is paramount.
Each participant is regarded as an equal with each having strengths and weaknesses which the others do not have. On the individual identity basis, this means that each identity expression --- Ego, SuperEgo, Unconscious, Personal Spirit --- has areas of decision-making and effort that it operates superbly in, and areas that is is unqualified or incapable of constructive effort.
On the team of individuals basis, each person brings an affinity for certain skills to the group according to their Basic Personality. Other areas, filled by other members, he or she is deficient in. Teamwork magnifies the effectiveness of the skills of each participant by providing a frequent opportunity to use, redefine, build, and further improve those strengths.
A willingness to develop and use one's gifted skills receives the respect of other team members. When invited to join the team, not every member will have developed the skills for which they are best attuned. Some will have been discouraged by parents, peers, friends and associates --- while others will have been encouraged. Support is seldom uniform. The result is that many people have an underlying sense of what they can do but have lost faith in themselves in some areas and have a dependent association with the skills they have developed. Willingness to develop equals willingness to take a risk.
It will always be more comfortable to take the position that because I am an artist at digging post-holes and receive many compliments and good pay for my work, that learning how to operate a machine which can dig perfect postholes 100 times faster discounts my (Ego) abilities. Being more comfortable seldom equals being more efficient or effective. Comfort is having familiarity and stability.
Comfort is Not the same as contentment.
A comfortable unwilling participant quickly loses the respect of the other team members. They sit quietly in the corner sulking because they can't have their way. They remove themselves from the team when they have a problem and push on in inflexibility to continually increase their level of frustration and anger. He or she does not do their part. They complain rather than seeking help and solutions. When they have spent their energy, they then go to other members in anger and frustration, to vent, not to find solutions. Their mantra is: "I don't want to do it because it did not work right the first time." That is not teamwork.
Contentment is knowing that one can change constructively to meet the changes of reality. Willing participants are always looked upon with optimism by their peers. They are always looking for ways to improve what they do. They are always making an effort without having to be prodded and reminded. They are going back to their peers and asking for better ways to do something, for constructive criticism, for help. They are equally ready to help their helpmates. Never intrusive or pushy, they respond when asked --- leaving the choice to initiate support to the spirit of the person in need. Teamwork is doing your part.
Respect also comes from being trusting and being trustworthy.
Being trusting means being willing to humble oneself and go to others when help is needed. It is not ego-centeredly and stubbornly pounding the post into the ground until it splits to uselessness --- and then blaming the post. It is being aware that the post is obstructed and looking to see what the obstruction is. It is removing any known obstruction and trying again. It is acknowledging that you have tried your best and that you need assistance from someone who may have more experience or more flexibility of thought. It is asking, not demanding, if the other person can help. It is demonstrating that you have made an effort to find the problem by informing them of what you have tried and what the result was. The Ego mantra here is: "I tried it and it doesn't work." That is not teamwork.
Being trustworthy means allowing others to come to you and ask for your assistance without your belittling them. It is being assertive enough to ask them what they have tried and sending them back to try again if they can't remember. If they can't remember what they did that failed, they will learn little from your doing it for them. You are not helping them by allowing them to become dependent on you. Being trustworthy means referring them to other sources of help if you are not skilled in the area of there concern or cannot give them early attention. You deceive yourself and them by providing maybes when certainties are possible. You raise their defences and frustration when your Ego is more concerned about conserving time than giving.
Being trustworthy also means being considerate of others.
When you approach another person for help, they may be focused on a demanding activity. Allow them to finish. If they have urgent priorities to meet first, acknowledge that you have heard and request a time when they will be more able to give you their attention. Perhaps you can leave them a message. If they are obviously distressed or happy, don't steal their feelings by interrupting. Instead, invite them to share their feelings with you. Teamwork is about sharing.
Is there something bothering them that You can help them with.
What success or pleasure has lifted their spirits? Ask, don't pester. If they want to share, allow them. If they want to reflect on the situation privately, allow them. Your having asked at least suggests that you care and that if and when they would like to share, they can share the experience with you. You have come for help. If your Ego is so selfish that it cannot give before receiving, it may never receive. Teamwork is give and receive, not take and take.

Potential weaknesses of the participant are acknowledged.
Change cannot happen if the individual is unaware that a change is needed in order to achieve more consistent and higher qualities of success. Feedback is required from other members and from the Supervisor.
A Personal Spirit is part of the Identity expressiveness of everyone seeking Spiritual Guidance. It can be strengthened on a daily basis. That part of the individual's identity can be encouraged to provide daily and hourly feedback about the performance and teamwork contribution of the other demonstrations of their identity. If you have certain targets and baselines of preferred and basic expressions of attitude, commitment, behavior --- you have something to compare reality against through reflection.
How was your day today?

Performance levels for praise and penalty are defined.
In a teamwork of individuals, the situation is more complex.
If each of the participants is receiving Spiritual Guidance dependably then each will be supervised by their Personal Spirit. Their Higher Selves will be unified as a Mentor but they will each be responsible for ensuring the integrity of their performance. If they fail to do this, one, or all --- time and resources will be wasted and the Opportunity for which the team was assembled will pass. The team will then, likely, be disbanded without completed the now wasted project.
When only one of the participants is receiving dependable Guidance, and, hopefully, the others are taking the opportunity to prepare their personal identity team to receive Guidance, the Receiver, must of necessity, become a temporary or interim supervisor, best understood as a Coach. Without this support, the less experienced and less-skilled participants would have little feedback until the Project was disbanded that their performance was deficient. This is due to the expressions of interference noted at the beginning and end of this document. If their Ego or SuperEgo prevents them from supervising themselves, and, either no one more skilled is available, or, they refuse to accept the Guidance conveyed through a coach --- there is little hope for success.
Direct Guidance for each individual is always preferred by the Spiritually Guided person. Only one's Ego or SuperEgo wants the power of directly or indirectly directing the behavior of others. This motivates the Spiritually Guided coach to do his or her best in assisting and accelerating the development of clear contact between the team members and their Higher Selves. Simply following one's own Guidance is a full-time activity, so the person requested to provide this service and accepting this position must have considerable strength of Spirit. Encouragement is obvious but there can be an equal requirement for critical feedback. This enables the failing individual the choice of making improvements before being dumped from the team for their Ego/SuperEgo interferences.
Penalty will only come from the Higher Self of the team.
To keep or let go a participant is not a spiritual choice of a coach. A deficient member may be kept in order to allow that individual every opportunity to develop skills which could be of substantial benefit to the spiritual direction of the world. Perhaps the frustrations brought to the team by a temporarily unperforming member provide an opportunity for increased awareness on their part. But if the member continues too long too resist the directions indicated for them in Guidance, their Higher Self, in not being able spiritually to be domineering --- must let them go from something they are demonstrating they are not ready for.
Dismissal is not always a penalty.
A member who is performing well and developing their skills effectively --- may be called upon by the team Higher Self to leave. Perhaps they can help the team better from a distance --- providing a link to other teams; developing skills and levels of awareness that experiences in the current team environment cannot provide.

Skills are refined and developed for greater strength.
Only through the honesty and frequent feedback of the team participants to each other and to the coach can the team work effectively. Without feedback, the individual members cannot develop trust in one another.
If a member never requests help, they are indicating that they are either passive and weak spiritually, and unprepared to remain on the team, or, that their Ego or SuperEgo is using pride and irresponsibility to avoid change. Eventually, their presence will hurt the efforts of the other participants through their demonstrated inability to exhibit self-control.
Higher Self Guidance never asks a person to do something they cannot do, or learn to do. I have addressed this many times in the other literature. We are frequently asked to do more than either our Ego or SuperEgo believe is possible. That is because each of those expressions of our identity can only imagine what they can best do. Spiritual Guidance takes you much beyond that, if you have faith and concentrate on doing and giving rather than on resting and taking. Many times, Spiritual Guidance will encourage you through the most difficult of situations to a successful conclusion --- as if guiding you by the hand through a frightening and dangerous forest.
Good team-members become, or at least appear, to be fearless.
They learn by experience that God will be by their side through the valley of the shadow of death. They know that by following their Guidance they will provide a valuable contribution.

Feedback for consistency is requested, and, hopefully given.
Every task given to an individual for completion that day, as received by Spiritual Guidance, should be reported on to the coach. Either you:

have completed it,
discovered something from doing it,
increased your skills through the practice,
had difficulties which you managed to solve,
have suggestions about what you have done,
would like more time to proceed further,
can define how far you were able to go,
have questions for clarification,
have criticism for improvements,
need help to do it,
have wasted time,
have done nothing.

Failures to communicate and act are questioned for resolve.
The only reason for no answer is that you have nothing to report because you have done nothing. By obeying the pride and shame of your Ego or SuperEgo, you allow those expressions of your Identity to believe and expect that they can get away with such behavior. The destructive part of this practice is that you WEAKEN your Personal Spirit even more, strengthen your Ego and SuperEgo to be more bold and lazy, and, drive yourself further and further away from Spiritual Contact. Teams cannot be fruitful if they have members who consistently follow practices which weaken themselves, and ultimately, the team.
A good team member is willing to suffer the sorrows of failure in order to use the motivating strength of their Ego and the social values of their SuperEgo to improve the quality of their contribution. No one's Ego wants disgrace, so when faced with repeated disgrace. For the uncontrolled Ego or SuperEgo, the team-member will choose to leave the group, or, they will make it clearly obvious to the team that they are unwilling to make changes, to give of themselves, to be considerate of others and respect of all including themselves. More manageable identity expressions will try to assist in the finding of new directions and behaviors which yield success: Change.

Dismissal from the team of members who will not integrate.
For the individual wishing to receive Spiritual Guidance, there can be no dismissal of the Ego expression of their Identity. Either they gain its cooperation through encouragement and self-discipline, or, they will never receive Guidance. Their Ego, and sometimes their SuperEgo, will forever block, disrupt, or confuse the communication signals. For as long as they live, their Higher Self will always be there by their side willing to help. If, and whenever, the person builds the strength of their Personal Spirit and obtains the support of their other identity expressions --- they will have the opportunity to receive Guidance.
Dismissal from a team of individuals who are trying to work together with Spiritual Guidance for accomplishment of a Guided project completion is another matter. Here, a team-member who cannot complete the tasks Guided for him or her, and who is not quick to request assistance when needed, and to give assistance when needed, must be allowed to leave. Their persistent failure reveals that they are unable to manage their identity expressions

IN SUMMARY:
Ego and SuperEgo (social conscience) interference can often be pointed out with the following terms:

Betrayal: Isn't (something else) better -- more important?
Delay: I'll do it next; I want to do (something else) first.
Denial: I didn't know; Are you sure you told me.
Excuse: I had other things to do; not enough time.
Fogging: What was that request again? Again? Again?
Forgetting: It must have slipped my mind; I must have forgotten.
Procrastinating: If it needs to be done, someone else will do it.
Rebelling: I don't want to do it; It isn't my style/way/desire.
Sabotaging: I'll do it (but I won't); You can(not) count on me.
Stalling: Can it wait until ...; I don't think I can do it until ....
Subversion: Do you think it necessary? What about (something else)?

Change, necessary for spiritual growth, and from within a spiritual perspective can only be encouraged by an assertive communication approach.

Benefits and disadvantages are defined;
Understanding the proposed changes is facilitated;
Potential weaknesses of the participant are acknowledged;
Skills are refined and developed for greater strength;
Performance levels for praise and penalty are defined;
Feedback for consistency is requested, and, hopefully given;
Failures to communicate and act are questioned for resolve;
Dismissal from the team of members who will not integrate.

COMMENT
This article was originally written for the coaching benefit of Team members to provide them with a summary of common factors and patterns which deter them from ASKING for Spiritual Guidance and by their lack of Persistent Self-Direction and Humility result in their loss of the Benefits that come from accessing and integrating Spiritual Guidance into their lives.
Like all similar articles, this one originated from and developed with the assistance of Spiritual Guidance. No intellectualized planning, researching or drafting was involved. The author was unaware of the content or the organization until the document was complete. GUIDANCE received to benefit a team, will often be relevant for many other people, perhaps yourself.

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